Hey readers! Roofus the rooster speaking, and I’m here to teach
you how to handle the hens in your life.
For starters, it helps to be a handsome beast. Ladies like a
good studly Roo, so try to keep your tail feathers pointed up, your cone and
waddle bright, and let your coloring shine through. But if for some reason your
feathers are ruffled, just stand tall. Hens like a rooster with confidence.
You know how they say
a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach? Well don’t let them fool you.
Chicks LOVE to eat! A full chick is a happy chick. So when treat lady stops by,
I always make sure my hens have all gotten some snacks before I indulge. Speaking
of treat lady, when she stops by, wait for her at the door. Ladies like it when
you do things like open doors and pull out chairs for them. It shows
initiative, and makes them feel important.
Hens like romance. So after you’ve wined and dined her, it’s
time to seduce her. The best way to do this is with a romantic gesture. My go
to move? I like to do a little dance. Most times they lay right down and we get
to roostering. Bow-Chicka-Wow-Wow!
Trust is important. Make sure your hen knows that you’re
always looking out for her. When my hens are out pecking in the yard, I am
usually on the lookout. If I hear or see something that might be danger, I alert
my hens and keep them at full attention until danger has passed. I worry when
my ladies are outside the fence, and sometimes I sit and watch until they come
back. I would give my life to protect my hens, and they know it. Stressed out
hens don’t lay eggs, so keep them feeling safe and stress free!On the
flip side, don’t pick fights if you don’t have too. Sometimes, when treat lady
comes by, I forget that she is the top hen (I mean come on, she sure looks
different than the rest of my girls!) and I try to show aggression towards her,
but she shows me her dominance, I realize I don't need to fight her, and I back off.
And finally, if all else fails, wit will get you far! A well
spoken rooster should have no problems getting the ladies!
